"ေယာက်္ား မိန္းမ အဘိဓာန္"

‌ေယာက္်ား … အရည္အခ်င္းရွိရင္ ႐ုပ္ဆိုးမယ္၊ ႐ုပ္ေခ်ာရင္ ေငြမရွာတတ္ဘူး၊ ပိုက္ဆံရွာတတ္ရင္ အိမ္ေထာင္ေရးကို အေလးမထားျပန္ဘူး၊ အိမ္ေထာင္ေရးပိုင္းမွာ ဖိစီးျပန္ရင္ တျခားကိစၥမွာ မျဖစ္ထြန္းဘူး၊ အရာရာ ျဖစ္ထြန္းေအာင္ျမင္တယ္ ဆိုတဲ့လူမ်ဳိးက်ေတာ့ အႏုအရြေလးေတြနဲ႔ ႐ုိမက္တစ္ မဆန္တတ္ျပန္ဘူး၊ အီစီကလီကြ်မ္းက်င္ၿပီး ႐ုိမက္တစ္ဆန္တတ္ျပန္ေတာ့ စိတ္ခ်အားကိုးလို႔မရဘူး၊ အားကိုးရတဲ့ လူမ်ဴိးက်ေတာ့ ခိုင္းစားလို႔ရ႐ုံကလြဲၿပီး ဘိုသီပတ္သီနဲ႔ အေပအေတ တစ္ေယာက္လိုေနမယ္။

မိန္းမ… ႐ုပ္အဆင္းလွရင္ အခ်က္အျပဳတ္မကြ်မ္း၊ ခ်က္တာျပဳတ္တာ ကြ်မ္းက်င္ေတာ့ မႏူးညံ့ျပန္၊ ႏူးညံ့ႏြဲ႔ေႏွာင္းေတာ့ ကိုယ္ပိုင္အေတြးအေခၚကမရွိ၊ ကိုယ္ပိုင္အေတြးရွိတာက်ေတာ့ ေယာက္်ားဆန္၊ မိန္းမပီပီေနေတာ့ အသံုးအျဖဳန္းကႀကီး၊ ေခြ်တာစုေဆာင္း တတ္တာက်ေတာ့ ေခတ္ေရစီးကို လိုက္မမွီ၊ ေခတ္မွီတာက်ေတာ့ စိတ္မခ်ရ၊ စိတ္ခ်ရတာက်ေတာ့ ဘယ္လိုမွ ၾကည့္လို႔မလွျပန္။
ပါးနပ္တဲ့ေယာက်္ားနဲ႔ ဥာဏ္ရွိတဲ့မိန္းမေတြ႔ရင္ ႐ုိမက္တစ္ဆန္တဲ့ အခ်စ္မ်ဳိး ျဖစ္လာႏိုင္တယ္။
ပါးနပ္တဲ့ေယာက္်ားနဲ႔ အူတူတူမိန္းမနဲ႔ဆိုရင္ တိတ္တိတ္ပုန္းအခ်စ္ေတြ ျဖစ္လာႏိုင္တယ္။
ဥာဏ္ရွိတဲ့မိန္းမနဲ႔ တံုးအတဲ့ေယာက္်ားေတြ႔ရင္ေတာ့ အိမ္ေထာင္ျပဳသြားႏိုင္မယ္။
ေယာက်္ားေရာ မိန္းမပါ ငထံုငအေတြ ဆိုရင္ေတာ့ ကိုယ္ဝန္ရသြားႏုိင္ပါတယ္ တဲ့၊ ဘာေျပာရမလဲ မသိေတာ့ဘူးရယ္။
မိန္းမေတြဟာ အနာဂတ္အတြက္စိတ္ပူၾကတာ ေယာက်္ားရသြားတဲ့အထိပဲ။
ေယာက်္ားေတြက်ေတာ့ မိန္းမ မရမခ်င္း အနာဂတ္ဆိုတာကို ေခါင္းထဲ မထည့္ၾကဘူး။
ေအာင္ျမင္တဲ့ေယာက္်ားဆိုတာ သူ႔မိန္းမ သံုးျဖဳန္းတာထက္ ပိုရွာႏိုင္တဲ့လူကိုေခၚတာ။ ေအာင္ျမင္တဲ့မိန္းမက်ေတာ့ အဲသလိုေယာက္်ားမ်ဳိး ရွာႏိုင္သူကို ေခၚတာတဲ့။
ကြာျခားခ်က္...
ဆင္းရဲသားေတြ ဝက္ေမြးတယ္၊ လူကံုထံေတြက်ေတာ့ ေခြးေမြးတယ္။
ဆင္းရဲသားေတြ အိမ္မွာဟင္းသီးဟင္းရြက္စားတယ္၊ လူကံုထံေတြ ဟိုတယ္တက္ၿပီး ဟင္းသီးဟင္းရြက္ စားတယ္။
ဆင္းရဲသားေတြ လမ္းေပၚမွာ စက္ဘီးစီးတယ္၊ လူကံုထံေတြ ဧည့္ခန္းထဲမွာ စက္ဘီးစီးတယ္။
ဆင္းရဲတုန္း မဂၤလာေဆာင္ခ်င္တယ္၊
ခ်မ္းသာေတာ့ လင္မယားေတြ ကြဲခ်င္တယ္။
ဆင္းရဲတုန္း မယားက secretary တာဝန္တြဲယူရတယ္၊
ခ်မ္းသာေတာ့ secretary က မယားတာဝန္ တြဲယူရတယ္။
ဆင္းရဲတုန္း ခ်မ္းသာခ်င္ေယာင္ေဆာင္တယ္၊ ခ်မ္းသာေတာ့ ဆင္းရဲခ်င္ေယာင္ေဆာင္တယ္။
ဒီေခတ္ႀကီးမွာ...
ဆင္းရဲသားေတြ အသားစားတယ္၊
လူကံုထံေတြ ပုစြန္စားတယ္၊ ပါတီေခါင္းေဆာင္ေတြက်ေတာ့ အလကားရတာမွန္သမွ် စားတယ္။
ေယာက်္ားေတြျမင့္ခ်င္တယ္၊
မိန္းမေတြပိန္ခ်င္တယ္။
ေခြးေတြ အကၤ်ီဝတ္ကုန္ၿပီး
လူေတြက်ေတာ့ ကိုယ္ေပၚကအသားေတြ ေပၚႏိုင္သေလာက္ ေဖာ္ၾကခြ်တ္ၾကတယ္။
FB's friend's post

just for a laugh (marriage joke)

sharing a FB friend's post :)

အေမး ~ အသက္ရွည္ရွည္ ေနႏိုင္ဖို႔ နည္းလမ္းေလးမ်ား ရွိလားဆရာ?
အေျဖ ~ အိမ္ေထာင္ျပဳလိုက္ပါ...
အေမး ~ အဲဒါက တကယ္အသက္ရွည္ေစတယ္လား ဆရာ?
အေျဖ ~ အသက္ေတာ့ မရွည္ပါဘူး။ အသက္ရွည္ရွည္ ေနခ်င္စိတ္ေတာ့ထပ္ျဖစ္လာေတာ့မွာ မဟုတ္ဘူး။

အေမး ~ မဂၤလာပြဲမွာ စံုတြဲေတြ ဘာလို႔ တစ္ေယာက္လက္ကို တစ္ေယာက္ ကိုင္ေလ့ရွိၾကသလဲ။
အေျဖ ~ ဒါက ထံုးတမ္းအစဥ္အလာ တစ္ခုပါပဲ။ လက္ေ၀ွ႔သမားေတြ မသတ္ပုတ္ခင္မွာ
လက္ဆြဲႏႈတ္ဆက္ၾကသလိုမ်ိဳးေပါ့။

အေမး ~ ေမာင္ ဒီေန႔က ခင္တို႔ရဲ႕ မဂၤလာႏွစ္ပတ္လည္ေနာ္။ ဘာလုပ္ၾကရင္ ေကာင္းမလဲဟင္?
အေျဖ ~ (၂)မိနစ္ေလာက္ (၀မ္းနည္းျခင္း အထိန္းအမွတ္နဲ႔) ၿငိမ္သက္ေနၾကတာေပါ့ကြာ။

အေမး ~ “ခ်စ္လို႔လက္ထပ္တာ” နဲ႔ “မိဘေတြစီစဥ္မႈေၾကာင့္ လက္ထပ္တာ”ကြာျခားပံု
အေျဖ ~“ကိုယ့္ကိုကိုယ္ သတ္ေသတာ” နဲ႔ “သူမ်ားအသတ္ခံရတာ”ဘယ္ဟာပိုေကာင္းလဲလို႔ ေမးတာနဲ႔ အလားသ႑ာန္ တူပါတယ္ဗ်ာ

Sierra Katow - Asian American comedian

she studied computer science she said.

English in other country

Doctor in action

MY DOCTOR

Let me tell you about my doctor. He's very good! If you tell him you want a second opinion, He'll go out and come in again! 

 

~~~~~

He treated one woman for yellow jaundice for three years ..

Before he realized she was Chinese.

 

~~~~~

Another time, he gave a patient six months to live. 
At the end of the six months, the patient hadn't paid his bill, 
So, the doctor gave him another six months. 

 

~~~~~

While he was talking to me, his nurse came in and said, 

"Doctor, there is a man here who thinks he's invisible." 

The doctor said, 

"Tell him I can't see him."

 

~~~~~

Another time, a man came running in the office and yelled, 

"Doctor, doctor! - my son just swallowed a roll of film!"

The doctor calmly replied, "Well let's just wait and see what develops."

 

~~~~~

One patient came in and said,

"Doctor, I have a serious memory problem" 
The doctor asked, "When did it start?"

The man replied, 
"When did what start?" 

 

~~~~~

I remember one time I told my doctor 

I had a ringing in my ears. 

His advice: 

"Don't answer it." 

 

~~~~~

 

When I told my doctor I broke my leg in two places, 
He told me to stop going to those places!

 

~~~~~

You know, doctors can be so frustrating. 

You wait a month and a half for an appointment, 

Then he says, 

"I wish you had come to me sooner."

工程师的习惯成自然 :)

Pumpkinstein :)

fun & creative way of planting - Pumpkins shaped like Frankenstein's head 
http://www.ktvu.com/news/news/pumpkins-shaped-frankensteins-head-are-hit/nhXQf/
 

笑话

學英文

小明剛學英文不久，有天爸爸好奇地打開他的筆記本，看過之後不禁毛骨悚然。筆記這樣寫著：

yes--爺死
nice--奶死
Bus--爸死
mouth--媽死
girls--哥死
was--我死
does--都死

老爸叫了一聲：這王八蛋， 才學了兩個月英文，家裡沒一個活著.


英文字母排列

為什麼英文是 ABCDEFG 排列的？
有個女孩問男 孩，為什麼英文是 ABCDEFG排列的？
男孩回答：因為 A boy can do everything for girls。（一個男孩可以為女孩做一切。）
女孩聽了非常感動，決定這一輩了非這個男孩不嫁。

但是....她忘了英文接下來的 排列是HIJK。（他只是在開玩笑。）

college humor

http://www.collegehumor.com/post/6469581/flowchart-can-you-skip-class-today

ေရွ့ေနငွားမွေထာင္လုံးလုံးက်

I think "ေရွ့ေနငွားမွေထာင္လုံးလုံးက်" in Burmese derived from the following story :)

A Mafia Godfather finds out that his bookkeeper, Guido, has cheated him out of $10,000,000.00.
His bookkeeper is deaf. That was the reason he got the job in the first place. It was assumed that Guido would hear nothing and would therefore never have to testify in court.
When the Godfather goes to confront Guido about the missing $10 million, he takes along his lawyer, who knows sign language. The Godfather tells
the lawyer, "Ask him where the money is."
The lawyer, using sign language, asks Guido, Where's the money?
Guido signs back, "I don't know what you are talking about." The lawyer tells the Godfather, "He says he doesn't know what you are talking about."
The Godfather pulls out a pistol, puts it to Guido's head and says, "Ask him again or I'll kill him!"
The lawyer signs to Guido, "He'll kill you if you don't tell him."
Guido trembles and signs back, "OK! You win! The money is in a brown briefcase, buried behind the shed at my cousin Bruno's house."
The Godfather asks the lawyer, "What did he say?"

The lawyer replies, "He says you don't have the guts to pull the trigger."

Super Bowl 2013 Kickoff

Super Bowl madness is at the highest today in SF Bay Area :)
Today - Sunday (2/3/13), the Baltimore Ravens will take on the San Francisco 49ers for Super Bowl XLVII (47th) in New Orleans. 

Americans are extremely sporties and consider to be violent oriented.
Just saw a 2000 movie " The Replacement " starting  Keanu Reeves and Gene Hackman.  This movie shows the other side of the game.  The famous movie line is the following:

"Woman Reporter: (Running to catch up with McGinty (coach) heading to the locker room for halftime) Coach, what will Washington need to get back into this game?
Jimmy McGinty: (pause) You've got to have heart.
Woman Reporter: Can you elaborate?
Jimmy McGinty: (striking his chest with his roll of papers) Miles and miles of heart." 
(quoted from http://www.moviequotedb.com/movies/replacements-the/quote_19774.html )

Today game the winner is ..........................................................................
Beyonce who performs in the Pepsi Super Bowl XLVII halftime show on CBS.
Sources said Beyonce got higher pay than all the players.

(No lip synching this time :) 
Her performance is very artistic, she is the most desirable woman and her all gals band is so sexy.

Homer's Top Ten Reasons For Him To Become President

first letter of your name tells about u:)

သင့္နာမည္ရဲ႕ ေရွ႕ဆုံး စာလုံးေလးေတြကုိ ၾကည့္ၿပီး ေဟာကိန္း ထုတ္ၾကည့္ ၾကစုိ႔

A― Romantic (စိတ္ကူးယဥ္ဆန္သူ)
B― Proud (ဂုဏ္ယူဝင့္ၾကြားတတ္သူ)

C― Innocent (အျပစ္ကင္းစင္သူ)
D― Lovable (ခ်စ္ခင္ႏွစ္သက္ဖြယ္ ေကာင္းသူ)
E― Good but Hurtful (စိတ္ထားႏူးညံ့သူ -သုိ႔ေသာ္ -ခံစားလြယ္သူ)
F― Compassionate (ေမတၱာဂ႐ုဏာတရားႀကီးမားသူ)
G― Logical Minded (သဘာဝက်စြာ ေတြးေတာတတ္သူ)
H― Leadership Potential (ေခါင္းေဆာင္ႏုိင္စြမ္းရွိသူ)
I― Helpful (ကူညီမႈေတြနဲ႔ ရွင္သန္သူ)
J― Free-Spirited (လြတ္လပ္ပြင့္လင္းစြာ ေနထုိင္သူ)
K― Irritating (စိတ္တုိ ထိခုိက္လြယ္သူ)
L― Funny (ေပ်ာ္ရႊင္တတ္သူ)
M― Emotional (စိတ္လႈပ္ရွား ထိခိုက္လြယ္သူ)
N― Sensible (စဥ္းစားေတြးေခၚ တတ္သူ)
O― Supportive (အေထာက္အကူ ပံ့ပုိးေပးႏုိင္သူ)
P― Crazy Q―Unpredictable (အ႐ူးအမူး စြဲလမ္း ႏွစ္သက္တတ္သူ)
R― Practical (လက္ေတြ႕သမား)
S― Loving (ခ်စ္ခင္ ၾကင္နာတတ္သူ)
T― Fake (ဟန္ေဆာင္ေကာင္းသူ)
U― Sensitive (ဆတ္ဆတ္ထိမခံ ရန္ေစာင္တတ္သူ)
V― Genius (ထူးျခားသည့္ ဉာဏ္ရွိသူ)
W― Calm (ေအးေဆးတည္ၿငိမ္သူ)
X― Easy-Going (ေအးေဆးတည္ၿငိမ္ ေဖာ္ေရြသူ)
Y― Intelligent (ဉာဏ္ရည္ ဉာဏ္စြမ္းထက္ျမက္သူ)
Z― Jovial (ေပ်ာ္တတ္ေသာ၊ ရႊင္ပ်ေသာသူ)

ကဲ သင္ကေရာ ဘယ္လုိျဖစ္ပါသလဲ …?

Who wants sushi? questioned by 成龍 Jackie Chan :)

Drummer Steals The Show :)

smiling :) & taking sad life :( as a kid

a joke from FB :)

Burmese cartoon from Facebook

S2 Love (heart shape)

<333	Multiple hearts
<3U	Love You
I<3U	I Love You
Other terms relating to 'love':
<2	Not quite love (<3)
<3U	Love You
<4	More than love (<3)
(L)	Love heart (MSN)
*_*	In love, dazed
//	Love, I love you
1234	1 thing 2 say 3 words 4 you (I Love You)
143	I Love You (letters in each word)
14344	I Love You Very Much (letters in each word)
1437	I Love You Forever
381	I Love You (3 words, 8 letters, 1 meaning)
4221	4ever 2gether 2love 1another
459	I Love You (phone digits for ILY)
520	I Love You (Chinese)
721	Love You (7 letters, 2 words, 1 meaning)
831	I Love You (8 letters, 3 words, 1 meaning)
AML	All My Love
BISLY	But I Still Love You
BLIND	In love
BTWITIAILWU	By The Way, I Think I Am In Love With You
BTWITIAILWY	By The Way, I Think I Am In Love With You
DULM	Do You Love Me?
DYLM	Do You Love/Like Me?
ELE	Everybody Love Everybody
FTLOG	For The Love Of God
GBML	Good Bye My Love
GOLD DIGGER	Person who loves someone just for their money
HDL	Hab Dich Lieb (I love you in German)
HICKEY	Love bite
HICKY	Love bite
HOLLAND	Hope Our Love Lasts And Never Dies
I<3U	I Love You
IDLY	I Don't Love/Like You
IIL	I'm In Love
IL	In Love
ILD	Ich Liebe Dich (I Love You)
ILH	I Love Him/Her
ILI	I Love It
ILML	I Love My Life
ILU	I Love You
ILU2	I Love You Too
ILUM	I Love You More
ILUSM	I Love You So Much
ILUT	I Love You Too
ILY	I Love You
ILY2	I Love You Too
ILYA	I Love You All
ILYAAF	I Love You As A Friend
ILYAM	I Love You As a Mate
ILYB	I Love You Both
ILYF	I'll Love You Forever
ILYG	I Love You Guys/Girls
ILYL	I Love You Lots
ILYLAS	I Love You Like A Sister
ILYLT	I Love You Long Time
ILYM	I Love You More
ILYSDM	I Love You So Damn Much
ILYSM	I Love You So Much
ILYSMB	I Love You So Much Baby
ILYSMM	I Love You So Much More
ILYT	I Love You Too
ILYVM	I Love You Very Much
ILYWAMH	I Love You With All My Heart
ISLY	I Still Love You
ITALY	I Trust And Love You
ITIAILWY	I Think I Am In Love With You
ITILU	I Think I Love You
ITILY	I Think I Love You
IWALY	I Will Always Love You
JLY	Jesus Loves You
JTM	Je t'aime (I love you)
K3U	I Love You (I <3 U)
KOI	Koibito (Japenese for lover)
LAFS	Love At First Sight
LAV	Lavatory, toilet Love
LDL	Long Distance Lover
LGMH	Love Gives Me Hope
LIITA	Love Is In The Air
LML	Love My Life
LOLAK	Lots Of Love And Kisses
LOLV	Lots Of Love
LOML	Love Of My Life
LQ	Liquor Lover's Quarrel
LS	Lovesick Life Story
LSP	Love Sick Puppy
LTH	Love Truth Honor
LU	Love You
LUA	Love You Always
LUB	Love
LUBB	Love
LUFF	Friendly Love
LUH	Love
LULAB	Love You Like A Brother
LULAS	Love You Like A Sister
LUMI	Love You, Mean It
LUMU	Love You Miss You
LURV	Love
LURVE	Love
LUSM	Love You So Much
LUV	Love
LUWAMH	Love You with All My Heart
LY	Love You
LY2	Love You Too
LYAAF	Love You As A Friend Love You Always And Forever
LYB	Love You, Bye
LYF	Love You Forever
LYL	Love You Lots
LYLAB	Love You Like A Brother
LYLAF	Love You Like A Friend
LYLAS	Love You Like A Sister
LYLMB	Love You Like My Brother
LYLT	Love You Long Time
LYM	Love You More
LYMI	Love You, Mean It
LYMY	Love You, Miss You
LYMYWY	Love You, Miss You, Want You
LYR	Love You Really
LYSM	Love You So Much
LYT	Love You Too
MCL	Much Clown Love
ML	Much Love
MULU	Miss You, Love You
NAMBLA	North American Man/Boy Love Association
ONE	One Love, goodbye
P&L	Profit And Loss Peace And Love
PLH	Peace, Love and Happiness
PLI	Potential Love Interest
PLUR	Peace, Love, Unity, and Respect
PNL	Peace And Love
S2	Love (heart shape)
SHMILY	See How Much I Love You
SLY	Still Love You
SPRUNG	Obsessed with someone, in love
SWEAT	Like, love
TE AMO	I love you (Spanish)
TI AMO	I Love You (Italian)
TKM	Te Quiero Mucho (Spanish for I love you)
TL	Talk Later True Love Team Leader
TLND	True Love Never Dies
TWLOHA	To Write Love On Her Arms
WAML	With All My Love
WLYB	Who Loves You Baby
WUB	Love
WUV	Love
YATLOML	You Are The Love Of My Life
YKYLM	You Know You Love Me
YLM	You Love Me?
Other terms relating to '(heart':
S2	Love (heart shape)
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